What's your love language?

Everyone’s talking about it, but here’s how to use it

Stars Insider

04/07/19 | StarsInsider

LIFESTYLE love

Lately it seems the world of dating and romance has been gravitating towards the topic of love languages. Many people know there are different ways of expressing love, but few people know the origins of this conversation, or that it's far from new. 

It actually stems back to 1992, when a man named Gary Chapman published a book called ‘The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate.’ It outlines five different ways to express and experience love, for which Chapman coined the term "love languages."

He claims that the five love languages are: receiving gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, and physical touch. According to this theory, each person has one primary and one secondary love language.

Being familiar with these forms of expressing and experiencing love, and knowing which languages you and your partner prefer, can be the make-or-break factor in a relationship. After all, lasting relationships depend first and foremost on love and communication, and speaking different love languages can be as different as Chinese is from English.

The book sold 8,500 copies in its first year, which was actually four times what the publisher expected. The next year it sold 17,000, and two years later, 137,000. It has spent around 300 weeks on the New York Times Best Seller list, it has been translated into over 40 languages, and it continues to become popular with every new generation embarking on their search for love. 

If you’re curious about how to figure out your own or someone else’s love language, and you want to know how to use those languages to better your relationships, check out this gallery to go over the basics and get some concrete examples.  

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